Weird Horror Magazine: AUTUMN 2023 by ISSUE 7

Author:ISSUE 7
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: UNDERTOW PUBLICATIONS

I wouldn’t realize until years after he died, what my father was trying to do when he’d take me or one of my brothers to a Raiders or Giants game. It would be just the two of us. I would explore the mountain that was the play structure shaped in the likeness of a green Coca-Cola bottle while Dad sought garlic fries to share. He wouldn’t ever complain when I’d inevitably lose interest in the game by halftime, and I’d sleep in the backseat while he drove in the dark. Sometimes he’d ask to play catch in the yard even if I wasn’t — couldn’t ever be — the athletic child he wanted. But my abuelo had been a cold and violent man, and my father wanted so, so badly to not be him. To be a good father. But how do you become what you do not know?

His ideas of a good father, a loving father, came from sitcoms and Saturday cartoons; things he could not translate over to his faggot child.

I thought about that as I sat in the gore of what Griff and I had been on the BART ride home. I wondered if any of that excused him. It didn’t.

Right?

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